Warning: This recap contains some strong, creative language that is not suitable for young ears. So if your ears are young or if might offend you… Stop reading. You have been warned.
In this post, we are focusing on the last 10 minutes of the Reunion… ‘Cuz quite frankly I’m tired of talking about panties and the lack thereof… So in preparation for tonight’s episode… let’s look once again at BunnyGate 2017™®©…
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills
S7/Reunion Part 2 of 3
AKA: “Into the Rabbit Hole”
Also AKA: “Oh Kim, Thou Art a Hateful Bit*h”
Just when I think Kim Richards can’t get any meaner… I’m immediately proven wrong.
Oh Kim, thou art a hateful bit*h.
So what does a washed-up child actor do when she desperately wants to be on a TV show? She exploits her grandkid, that’s what she does. She takes something that was well-intentioned and twists it into evil. I guess it could have been worse – she COULD have boiled the bunny, a la Fatal Attraction… So there’s that.
If you remember, several episodes ago, Lisa Rinna unexpectedly gave a gift of a stuffed bunny to Kim for her yet to be born first grandchild. I remember thinking at the time how odd I thought it was since these two had not been especially friendly.
Fast forward to the Reunion – We learn the bunny was a merely a peace offering – It was all none other than THE Harry Hamlin’s idea. They play footage of Kim nicely accepting Rinna’s apology a few episodes ago for what she had said about Kim throughout the season. Rinna thanked Kim for being “open” to her apology. On the Reunion, Rinna says they have both moved on. Kim thinks there’s a lot of hope for their relationship (Rinna and Kim’s).
At this point, everything is all rainbows, unicorns, and lollipops.
But we all turn into suckers when Andy reads a completely scripted “question” with a straight face from a non-existent viewer named “Lily” from “Springdale, Arkansas” asking what Kim did with the bunny that Rinna got Kim’s grandchild.
Then the childish child actress gleefully and dramatically reaches behind the couch as Andy knowingly smirked and Kyle began to brace herself for what she knew was about to happen…
Kim says, “I brought the bunny… because I never gave it to my grandson because it didn’t feel like it had good energy. Sorry. So I think what I should do – Is give it to you and when you are in a better place… Maybe you can give it back to me? Because right now I don’t feel like it was given to me with the right energy. And… it’s just been sitting there – And I just couldn’t give it to my grandson because I’m all about energy and positive things.”
Rinna just sat there through it all… Stunned… Silently nodding… She finally stammered, “Okay.”
Well, one thing I’m positive about – is that Kim Richards is the Assholiest Asshole in ALL the land. Take a seat, Kim – you ungrateful bit*h.
Eden (oh, how I’m gonna miss you next season) graciously offers Kim one of her crystals that might be able to heal her. Kim insists that she’s “healed” and that she’s “good.”
No, Kim… There is NOTHING good about this, you little bit*h. You’re not “healed” – not even close. Is there such a thing as a bit*h rehab? #AskingForAFriend… No wait… #AskingForABitch
Meanwhile, Kyle continued to gnaw on her fingers down to the nuggets as if they were a finger food appetizer.
I mean after all, the table was set… and Rinna’s rabbit was served.
In a chat on FB I had with Namaste, she described it perfectly when she said that Kyle looked like she wanted to put on her cloak of invisibility.
Kim blathers on about how Lisa and her lips could give the bunny to someone else… And that maybe there would be better energy if she did give it to someone else.
Wait… Which is it… Do you want Rinna to give it back to you when you guys are in a better place? Or do you want her to give it someone else? You confuse me, Kim. This whole scene was mere minutes but you contradict yourself and emotionally flip flop a million times.
Rinna is clearly upset by it – but hasn’t said anything much at this point.
I’m sure there is an “Energizer Bunny” joke in there somewhere… but I’m just too appalled to look for it.
Then Kim, with a full on smirk on her face tells a clearly upset Rinna in her snottiest voice possible, “You don’t hafta cry over it.”
You’re such a little bit*h, Kim.
Right… Like THAT wasn’t your intent from the beginning – to make Rinna cry. This whole scene was purposefully orchestrated by you and any number of people around you who are trying to get you back on the show…
Kim, you WANTED to make Rinna cry… that was the GOAL. Andy… Please oh puhleeze get this bit*h off this show… She’s horrible!
And…and… AND… She’s making me defend Rinna – and THAT is the very LAST thing I want to do this season, dagnabit. Well wait… on second thought maybe defending Dorit would be the very LAST thing I would want to do…
No… that’s not it, either. I think defending Erika would be the absolute LAST thing I would want to do this season… Contrary to popular belief, I actually DO like Erika at times – I just hate that the last several episodes have been all about PantyGate 2017®™©.
Yes, that’s it… the 3rd to the last person I’d want to defend is Rinna, the 2nd to the last person is Dorit… Wait… I’d much rather defend Dorit than Rinna…
Okay, I’ve got this now… the 3rd to the last person I’d want to defend is Dorit, the 2nd to the last person I’d want to defend is Rinna… and the VERY LAST person I’d want to defend is Erika.
OMG OMG OMG… No.. that’s ALL wrong. The very, very LAST person I’d ever want to defend is Kim. Or Brandy… but who cares ‘cuz Brandy’s not on the show anymore… like Kim… So why is Kim getting so much airtime again?
Whew… that made my brain hurt.
Okay, so where were we? Oh yeah…
Oh Kim, thou art a hateful bit*h.
Kim continues on to say that she could have regifted the bunny but that she thought it was better to give it back to Rinna. I wish little bunny foo foo would scoop up Kim and bop her on her head right about now.
Right, Kim… You thought it was best to give it back to her ON camera… in an overly dramatic way… How nice of you to exploit your unborn grandchild is such a heinous way.
Vanderpinkie feebly attempts to jump in and convince Rinna that Kim is saying there’s hope for their future relationship. Who in the heck cares? I HATE that Vanderpump tried to sugar coat this crappy situation. You know I mostly lova ya, Vanderpinkie – but “zip it.”… lol…
Eileen wonders aloud what giving back the bunny during the Reunion means… She suggested what we’re all thinking… “Send it back in the mail.” Actually, I thought she should have just donated it to charity… but what do I know?
Can we send Kim back in the mail? But where would we send her? I’ve heard Antarctica is nice this time of year… Kim would fit right in ‘cuz her heart is already as cold as ice. Do they have bit*h rehabs in Antartica?
Andy wants Rinna to say something but with tears in her eyes and snot running down her nose, Rinna wisely says, “I don’t need to explain myself. I don’t need to say a word. I get it – loud and clear.”
Kim says, “I think it’s good that you feel bad for a minute – because you hurt me.” She HURT you? By giving you a bunny?
Oh Kim, I’m sure you mean she hurt you because Rinna made some comments about how you still might not be entirely sober… that you are close to death… that Kyle enables you…
But Kim, you’ve lied to others to their faces for years about your alcoholism… You’ve done things that got you arrested… You’ve been kicked out of restaurants you’ve been going to since you were a child because you were drunk…
Rinna’s statements are not THAT outlandish. Dagnabit… I’m defending Rinna again…. UGH! I HATE this! I do hate that Rinna got Rinna-nesia and pretended not to remember saying them… but that’s not what this is about at all.
Rinna stands and says she’s walking away for a second because it all didn’t feel right to her at that moment. She exited the stage and left the bunny – as any soap opera actress would do. Eileen ran after her – again… as any soap opera actress would do.
Frankly, I’m surprised Erika didn’t join them because she’s an aspiring soap opera actress, too.
Eileen tells Rinna offstage, “That was a calculated move with that bunny – You had a good heart and you were trying to end this sh*t.”
Eileen continues, “She was just trying to demean you and hurt you.”
Rinna concludes that Kim can’t demean or hurt her because she has a beautiful life and family – and that this is all Kim’s stuff. They correctly assess that Kim’s actions are opposite of good “energy.” Kim’s actions reveal her true colors.
I think that color is black. The color of Kim’s heart.
Rinna knows this is not going to turn out well for Kim. She smugly smiles and says of Kim, “Good for you – I hope you feel good about it.”
Meanwhile, back on stage, Kyle nonsensically encourages Kim to find Rinna offstage so she can explain to her why she’s superstitious? Huh?
As Kim starts to walk off the stage, Andy puts on his puppy dog face and asks Kim, “Are you gonna bring the bunny?” Eden immediately smiles ‘cuz she sees thru to Andy’s manipulative intentions. Andy says the bunny makes him laugh so much… He says, “It’s terrible.”
So… you see Kim walking with a cellophane wrapped bunny in her hands like she’s going to present some flowers to a friend who just performed in a play or something…
Kim confronts Rinna and asks, “Can I talk to you?”
Rinna finds her voice and sternly says, “No.” And walks away.
So.. that’s how the show ended last week… I’m sure there will be plenty more about BunnyGate 2017™®© tonight…KMN…
By the way, “KMN” is from The Big Bang Theory (at least that’s where I heard it first) and it’s an abbreviation for “Kill Me Now.” I use it a lot. I anticipate using it next week, too… And for several months thereafter because we’re watching the Real Housewives of New York City next… lol.
That reminds me… I still have a post I’m eager to finish about RHONY… hopefully tomorrow… lol…
Thanks for reading…
Video of the Week
In honor of Namaste’s “invisible cloak” contribution to this recap… Plus, with all the stresses in the world – don’t we ALL need a little more “Namaste” AND “namaste” in our lives? So if you add goats to a yoga class… It might just bring about world peace, no?
This YouTube video was posted by UK MAIL COM entitled, “You’ve Goat to be Kidding Me! Baby Goats Take Part in Yoga Class.” Here are two other links to yoga goat videos – one on YouTube and the original that was posted by Jenness Farm itself that I saw on Facebook and are also fun: