The Real Housewives of New York City
RHONY’s Relationship Status – “It’s Complicated”
Part 1 of 3
It’s been a bazillion years since I took a self-imposed hiatus on blogging about the Real Housewives. It’s now 6 episodes in and we can see the trajectory for the season.
As the season began, I was confused by how much the relationships had changed between the housewives and their friends since last season. It’s like we unknowingly wandered into the middle of a war zone with explosive words strategically being thrown at each other like hand grenades.
The level of vitriol was surprising and I didn’t quite understand why everyone was so danged mad at each other. So I carefully rewatched most of the episodes and tried make sense of it all. Silly, silly me…
The volume of information was shocking… At one point, the word count for this blog was 10,464 (gasp!) so I significantly pared it down and separated it into 3 bite-sized pieces.
Part 1 (this post) describes why Bethenny and Carole might be cranky at the other women for various reasons. The relationship analysis is based on what we watch on the show, hear in their talking head interviews (TH), see on social media, and for some of them, read in their blogs.
In Part 2 – We will take a closer look at Dorinda, Luann, Ramona, Sonja, and Tinsley’s relationships.
Part 3 will delve a bit into a few of the more important scenes this season thus far and will include some quotable quotes. Whew…
Grab some popcorn and your drink of choice… ‘Cuz these b*tches be crazy! (I had to include a gratuitous nod to the BBT – Thanks, Sheldon!)
Bethenny’s Friendship Status – “It’s Devastated”
Bethenny has a lot going on personally and professionally. She is devastated at the loss of “Cookie” her beloved dog who loved her way back when she was physically schlepping her home-made muffins to sell at grocery stores.
Bethenny’s added a house flipping business into her professional repertoire, launched a skinny jean business, adopted two dogs… Oh, and she spearheaded a ginormous disaster relief effort via her B Strong charity to help with the devastation in Puerto Rico and around the world. For more info: https://www.delivering-good.org/bstrong
Bethenny barely has time to breathe – much less to suffer fools gladly. This season, her acerbic wit is especially biting when directed at Ramona. But really, no one’s safe.
Carole – Bethenny seems frustrated because it’s difficult for her to get in touch with Carole. Allegedly, Carole’s phone rebels against recording voicemails and it seems that Carole can be somewhat tardy in replying to text messages. Especially those sent while Carole was running in the NYC Marathon. Go figure… lol.
Shockingly, Tinsley doesn’t seem to have trouble getting in touch with Carole this season since they’ve become besties.
When Carole and Bethenny are asked publically about their friendship status – they both kind of say they’re still friends but that their friendship has changed.
It seems that Bethenny thought the change happened because she hadn’t been as available for her friend as she once was… whenever that was.
So Carole moved on and found Tinsley. To me, Carole and Tinsley are as unlikely of a pair of friends as there has ever been.
- Carole has a cool girl image – and Tinsley presents herself as an “It” girl…
- Carole is a low key homebody who would rather stay home and not name her pets than to go out and socialize. Tinsley is the very definition of a “socialite”…
- Up until this season, Carole’s definition of a new hairstyle was when she used a scrunchie to pull it back into a ponytail. Tinsley has her hair professionally styled almost every single danged day.
- Carole has a quiet demeanor. Tinsley is often overly dramatic.
I guess opposites attract. Carole and Tinsley over-laugh at each other’s jokes, complete each other’s sentences, and ignore Bethenny whenever she walks up to them… even when it’s just the 3 of them for lunch.
You can tell Bethenny is not happy about it… I don’t think Bethenny is used to being ignored.
You can just tell there’s going to be an explosion at some point… it’s simmering down beneath the surface… lol. Yet it’s hard to tell whether the explosion will come from Bethenny or from Carole.
Personally, I think it will be Carole because I don’t think Bethenny currently cares enough about Carole to explode at all… Especially after Bethenny reads Carole’s blogs… I mean, you know, if she actually DOES read Carole’s blogs… lol.
Dorinda – In the first part of Bethenny and Dorinda’s journey to Puerto Rico, Dorinda got so drunk that she made disparaging comments to Bethenny’s disaster relief partners. These are the people who have given their lives to serve people who are in distress around the world.
Bethenny was absolutely mortified and livid at what drunk Dorinda had said… or rather, slurred.
Bethenny takes her businesses and charities very seriously. Remember last season when Bethenny almost left Ramona behind when they went on their tequila trip because she didn’t want Ramona to do or say anything to embarrass her in front of her tequila partners?
In fact, Bethenny was so angry with Dorinda that she uninvited her to fly on to Puerto Rico with her… but then she re-invited Dorinda via a text moments later. Bethenny had to apologize profusely to her partners on behalf of drunk Dorinda who had attempted to dramatically stomp off out of the restaurant but she couldn’t find the exit door.
Dorinda’s blog this week tells us that Dorinda didn’t know anything about having to attend the early evening get together with Bethenny’s charity partners. She implied that’s why she felt she could drink as much as she did.
Dorinda, I love you, but you’re on a disaster relief trip – Why, oh, why are you drinking yourself into oblivion at all?
The next morning, Bethenny had a heart-to-heart with Dorinda about her drinking issues while they were on the plane to Puerto Rico. This meant that Dorinda could NOT get up and walk out – ‘cuz that first step would have been a doozy.
Personally, I don’t think a conversation this serious should have happened on camera unless Dorinda had pre-agreed to it. Dorinda has been holy cow drunk several times already this season – and it has not been pretty.
Bethenny expressed to Dorinda that she had given her the benefit of the doubt on several occasions when Dorinda said crappy things – because she knew it was because Dorinda was drunk.
I think the season of Bethenny giving Dorinda the benefit of the doubt is over. We’ll talk more about Dorinda’s perspective on Bethenny in Part 2 of this blog.
Luann – Okay, brace yourselves… Bethenny and Luann are now the best of friends! I know. I know… wonky, right?
I guess everything from the past has been forgiven – Go figure! They even… <gasp> went out together to paint the town red after the Halloween party.
And… and… AND… Luann genuinely apologized to Bethenny because she realized Bethenny (and the others) were right about Tom all along. Bethenny probably has that gif of Luann apologizing to her on her phone so she can play it over and over at will.
As far as I can tell, this season, Luann has only done one thing that could be construed as being remotely embarrassing to Bethenny. It’s when Luann attempted to channel her inner Marilyn Monroe when she sang a fun, but over the top rendition of “Happy Birthday” to Bethenny at a restaurant. It was hilarious.
Ramona – Let’s just say that Bethenny and Ramona are not likely to ever be friends. However, I will say that they are friends enough that Bethenny invited her to her charity event.
One of the skirmishes Bethenny and Ramona have had thus far was concerning a house Bethenny bought on Montauk Hwy in the Hamptons. Upon hearing about the location of the house, Ramona immediately put Bethenny’s purchase down by saying that SHE would NEVER buy anything on the highway.
Ramona implied that she knows more about real estate than Bethenny. You just hafta laugh at Ramona, no?
Bethenny also might be cranky at Ramona because at one point, Ramona compared herself to Bethenny and said, “I’m like you” because she thinks they are similarly entrepreneurial. No one wants to be “like” Ramona – NO ONE – especially Bethenny.
Bethenny said some yucky things to Ramona – You’ll see some of them when we talk about Ramona’s relationships and also in the Quotable Quotes section.
In Ramona’s TH, she said that no one can ever question Bethenny. Ramona implied Bethenny can’t handle criticism. I will say that if you come at Bethenny, you had better have your facts straight.
I think Bethenny can handle criticism EXCEPT when it comes from Ramona. I suspect that Bethenny thinks she knows more than Ramona in a lot of areas. Remember, Bethenny, “Knows it all!” lol…
I honestly think Bethenny has had to handle a TON of negative criticism throughout her life. It has torn her apart because too often it’s come from people who she should have been able to trust and who should have been constructively supporting her endeavors… like her parents and her former husband.
As a result, Bethenny has had to learn to use her Christian Louboutin boots to immediately squash anything negative that crawls her way. This includes a negative cockroach named Ramona.
Sonja – Bethenny seems to be in a really great place with Sonja. She even gives Sonja the sage advice to stop talking so much and instead to focus her words on the topic at hand.
Bethenny feels bad for Sonja because she realizes the other women are freezing Sonja out by banishing her repeatedly to the end of the table whenever they get together. It seems like Bethenny looks at Sonja as a wounded bird who needs to be protected in some ways.
Tinsley – In the first couple of episodes, Bethenny gives kudos to Tinsley and Ramona for their early donations to her fledgling charity.
However, we have since learned ALL of the housewives ultimately gave to her charity – but only Tinsley and Ramona were invited to an event that celebrated the work Bethenny and her charity was doing in Puerto Rico. Everyone else is probably mad at Bethenny for that…
Dennis – During these episodes, Bethenny is back together with her on again/off again boyfriend, Dennis. I like seeing them together because I think he’s great at bringing out the best in her without being intimidated by her.
I also love that he wears ugly designer-label sweaters that Bethenny despises. I suspect that once he found out Bethenny hated them he went out and bought one in every style and color. I have no way of knowing if that really happened or not – but however it happened – he has lots and lots of these sweaters and he wears them with great glee. I love it… lol.
In addition – Bethenny could be cranky at everyone because she arrived 12 minutes late to her own birthday party at a restaurant and no one was there yet… This is a reoccurring theme. When everyone arrived tardy to the party, no one said, “Sorry, we’re late.” This is likely a production thingie… but Bethenny has a real issue with tardiness.
Carole’s Friendship Status – “It’s Decaffeinated”
First of all, everyone should be mad at Carole for continually using the word “honey” so pejoratively this season. It’s driving me crazy. I’m sure there’s a reason behind it – like someone said they hated it so she’s doing it at every possible opportunity or something.
I also think the chef preparing Carole’s breakfast could be frustrated with Carole. She took a “3 eggs cooked any way” meal to mean that she could order 2 eggs cooked one way and 1 of them cooked another way. Plus, who in the heck orders hard boiled eggs for breakfast?
I’ve honestly never seen anyone order a hardboiled egg for breakfast unless they were going to save it to eat later. But… Carole’s entitled to her eggs any way she wants, I guess. Oh, and the 2 kinds of eggs were not allowed to touch each other… lol. At least Carole has a good sense of humor about it.
Bethenny – Carole might be mad at Bethenny for saying that Carole needs to have a friend accessible to her 24/7. It felt like Bethenny was implying that Carole is a “needy baby/greedy baby.”
Also, Bethenny accused Carole of not returning her calls. She told Carole that she tried to call her 10 times – but Carole said that she didn’t.
Bethenny further stated that Carole didn’t respond to her texts… but Carole whipped out her phone and “corrected” her. It sounds like Bethenny texted Carole several times and then got one short text back.
I dunno, it’s one thing IF this all happened while Carole was physically running the marathon itself… because Carole should get the benefit of the doubt, no? However, if others are also having trouble getting through to Carole – it seems like we have a failure to communicate.
Carole accuses Bethenny of some stuff in her blog this week. Carole writes of Bethenny, “While she talks smack about me on the show, I’m saying how proud I am of her.” Carole goes on to say, “Wow…at this point, I’m just sitting back with popcorn like the rest of you, watching this TV character (who I thought was a good friend) continue to take cheap shots.”
Whoa… Carole is NOT happy with Bethenny… I don’t remember Bethenny talking smack about Carole behind her back that she didn’t also say to her face. It may have to do with Puerto Rico… but I don’t know. I didn’t see much bad mouthing.
Dorinda – I don’t remember seeing a single reason why Carole would be mad at Dorinda.
Luann – Carole is cranky that Luann brought up that Carole is the one housewife who didn’t text Luann upon hearing the news about her divorce. Carole’s position is that she; 1) didn’t want to be fake and generally doesn’t like to intrude in other people’s personal lives; and, 2) Luann didn’t text Carole when she broke up with Adam – so the fact that Luann expects it from Carole but not from herself means, as Carole said, “She is holding her friends to a higher standard than she holds herself.”
Carole is also cranky at Luann for continually minimizing Carole’s 3-year (maybe longer – don’t quote me on it) relationship with Adam and tells her, “It was much more significant than your 7-month marriage.”
I get twitchy when people compare the quality of their relationship with someone else’s.
Just because a relationship lasts longer – doesn’t automatically mean it’s “more significant.” However, in this unique case, since Luann’s former husband, Tom, never actually stopped dating when they got engaged and throughout their entire marriage – Carole is likely correct. But it still makes me twitchy.
Carole also thought it was in very bad taste that Luann used blackface to color her skin when she dressed as Diana Ross. Ramona said she thought it was just some extra spray tan. I think Ramona’s right – but it was like several shades darker than usual. It reminded me of when Big Brother makes a houseguest go through several rounds of tanning until you can almost peel the tan off.
When Tinsley told Luann that Carole likes Luann when she’s being “truly authentic and real” – Luann says of Carole, “Oh really, who is Carole? The judge of authenticizian? The judge of authentic? Really? Let’s move on.”
This is coming from someone who STILL refers to herself as a “Countess” though the title officially turned into a pumpkin once Luann got remarried.
Luann still accuses Carole of having an affair with her niece’s boyfriend. Carole continues to say he wasn’t her boyfriend at the time. OMG OMG OMG…This is so 3 seasons ago, no? Why oh why are we STILL talking about it??? Oh wait… this is the “Real Housewives”… Nevermind.
Ramona – Carole could be mad at Ramona for not throwing her an appropriately marathon-themed party while they were in the Hamptons. It is clear that Ramona was having a get together with friends who probably wanted to also be on the show – so the already planned party just merged right into being a marathon celebration.
Carole was cranky there wasn’t any marathon memorabilia at the party anywhere to be seen. Obviously, Ramona missed the opportunity to use Carole’s running shoes as the dinner table’s centerpiece.
Carole’s snide TH comments made her sound like an ungrateful gooberhead. I guess initiating a toast that celebrated Carole’s marathon accomplishment, providing a scrumptious dinner, and bringing out a delicious cake decked out with candles that Carole had to blow out was just not good enough for Carole. Poor thang.
Evidently, Carole expected a casserole and a parade. It’s okay, Carole… I’m sure Ramona expected a gracious guest.
Sonja – Carole is miffed at Sonja because she continues to badmouth Carole’s best friend, Tiffany.
In addition ,at Bethenny’s birthday dinner, Sonja took one look at Carole and told her the marathon must have made Carole’s hair turn gray. Wait, what? Who says crap like that? What woman likes to be told their hair looks gray – except those who are going for the gray look?
This only confirmed Carol’s opinion that Sonja is nice/nasty. Carole points out that her hair is NOT gray, it’s “ash.” I’m biting my tongue not to say anything more. Never fear, though… in later episodes, Carole’s hair conveniently takes more of a blonde turn somehow… lol.
Tinsley – Carole loves Tinsley. That is all.
Adam – Evidently, Adam moved out of Carole’s apartment but not out of her life. Up until last week, they saw each other every day (or every other day) to have “coffee.”
Now, I know what I mean when I say I had “coffee” with a friend – but we’ve learned that having “coffee” with Carole is a whole nuther Oprah because it often involves being nekkid at some point.
Drinking coffee when you’re nekkid sounds dangerous, no? Spilling it could leave a nasty scar. Who wants to take their lives into their hands over a cup of coffee? That “coffee” must be really, really good! I do admit it’s hard to resist those creamy coffee hearts the barista artistically creates…
My mind starts to wander as I think about the size of the coffee in question – whether it’s “short,” “tall,” “grande,” “venti,” or “trenta.” I snap out of it just in time as I muse about the cream and how we might not be talking about coffee after all.
Carole wondered if she would see less of Adam once they both ran the NYC Marathon – but that hasn’t happened. Carole insists they are not boyfriend and girlfriend or “friends with benefits.” Carole does say that if Adam started dating someone it would be “a betrayal.”
Okay, so just this last week we find out that Adam went out on a date with someone (without clearing it first with Carole) – and that he really, really likes her. Ruh oh… No more coffee for you!!
Everyone – Carole could be legitimately cranky at everyone (but Tinsley) for not bothering to show up to her marathon or to its aftermath… It was a pretty big deal.
I have been to 3 marathons… the San Diego Rock ‘N Roll Marathon, the Long Beach Marathon, and the Los Angeles Marathon to cheer on friends I knew who were running.
None of them knew I was going to be there so none of them knew to be looking for me at all. It was one of those things I decided to do at the last minute and I knew I risked not seeing them. But it was really kewl to be there to cheer on EVERYONE who was running.
I may not be physically able to run a marathon myself – and I know this will be shocking to you all – but I can be pretty verbal and exuberant in my cheering.
My marathon attendance tips would include 1) Wear bright clothing so they can pick you out in the blur of people as they’re running by; 2) Try to not sit with the rest of the crowd; 3) Try to pick a spot near a bathroom; 4) Be open to not being at the finish line ‘cuz that’s where EVERYONE goes – but instead choose a point in the race you think they may need extra encouragement to actually finish the race (I’m usually around the 16 – 20 mile point); 5) Wear plenty of sunscreen; 6) Bring drinks and snacks, and, 7) Cheer loudly for all of the runners like a stark raving lunatic.
By the grace of God, my running friends ALL heard my voice and recognized me every single time. They saw and heard me way before I saw them.
The surprised and excited looks on their faces were absolutely priceless. I was so grateful to be able to witness this huge milestone in their lives. I was so danged proud of them. I’ll never forget it.
Anyhoo… That’s it for Part 1 of our 3 Part journey… kinda like the 3-Part Reunion shows… If all goes well, I will post Part 2 tomorrow.
I appreciate you guys so much for sticking with me through the roller coasted ride of my life over the last couple of years. I’m trying hard to get my mojo back… Sometimes it’s just really hard to try to be mildly humorous when life is so painful.
You guys rock!
Video of the Week
Videos of dogs and children continue to crack me up. I found this YouTube video posted by Poke My Heart entitled, “Toddler and Dog Sing the Blues.” Enjoy!
All photos are video screenshots of the episodes that can be accessed at: www.bravotv.com. Thanks, Bravo!